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Band 4.5

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Ohter argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #ohter #situations
In
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At
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 present time unfavourable occupation and lack of budget
is
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are
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 getting a common issue. Many
people
 have to tolerate
with
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apply
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these factors due to
competitive
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a competitive
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 society where it is challenging to find other jobs. On other hand, it is believed that working on the improvement of
such
 situations will be
best
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the best
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 option.
This
 essay will discuss both opinions. In my opinion, it is better to look for other opportunities
such
 as studying abroad and changing
employee
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employees
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. To commence with , most of
public
Add an article
the public
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 are getting patient with their unloved
job
 and salary because they are worried to lose their existing
job
.
For instance
 , even
I
Correct word choice
though I
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have completed
degree
Correct article usage
a degree
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 abroad I am still working in
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the low
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low paid
Add a hyphen
low-paid
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 and boring
Correct your spelling
workplace
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work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
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. The reason is that because of the scarcity of
job
 market it is impossible to easily find a
job
especially
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,especially
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 a high paid work. To illustrate, some
people
 are trying their best to search for other jobs, changing their major and going through varied
trainings
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training
pieces of training
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 and workshops to enhance their professional
skill
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skills
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.
This
 would definitely
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change
show examples
chang
Correct your spelling
change
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 their poor condition. So , while one's attitude is stable and calm toward low income and not interesting jobs, others will seek for other employers and study
unnesssry
Correct your spelling
unnecessary
degree
 and courses . On other hand, I totally believe that studying abroad and finding other
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 is essential.
For example
, one of my aquantaise went to study abroad in Canada and after completion of her new
degree
Add a comma
,degree
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 she easily found high paid
job
 in Canada. It provided her with
exciting
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the exciting
an exciting
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job
 which was fascinating for her and at the same time increased her monthly salary to high demand.So, acquiring
degree
Correct article usage
a degree
show examples
 abroad and looking for
new
Add an article
a new
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 perspective
job
 abroad assisted her in quitting her uninteresting
job
 and finding high-
income
Correct article usage
an income
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job
. Most
people
 have to tolerate
with
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apply
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their boring workplace and
low -paid
Correct your spelling
low-paid
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 salary
when
Correct word choice
while
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 others are struggling with finding a better way
for
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to
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improvement
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improve
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.
However
 , getting
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 or another education and looking for
other
Change the wording
another
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job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
search
Fix the agreement mistake
searches
show examples
 will be
best
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the best
show examples
 opportunity for life imprisonment. If
people
 seek
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other chances
such
 as education and
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
job
 it will change humankind's live standards
to
Replace the word
too
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high
Add an article
a high
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 extent .
Submitted by zhadym on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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