Some people feel that young people should follow the traditions of their society. Others, however, believe that young people should be free to behave as individuals. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is believed that the young generation should follow the traditional social standard while others argue that they should have their own liberty to behave as they desire. In my opinion, children
Correct your spelling
should
shoul
Correct your spelling
should
be free
acient
Correct your spelling
ancient
notions so they can show their own
ative
Correct your spelling
native
active
live
and behaviour. The essay will analyse follow the
Correct your spelling
traditional
tradional
Correct your spelling
traditional
society will create a good environment for people and free
also
bring many
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
before
clarify
Change the verb form
clarifying
show examples
the conclusion. On the one hand, it is
adventageous
Correct your spelling
advantageous
to follow the tradition of society,
such
as creating good habits and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
environment.
For example
, Korean people always bow their
head
Fix the agreement mistake
heads
show examples
when they received other help.
This
tradition has been
reagarded
Correct your spelling
regarded
as Korean's unique for a long time. It can be seen that following classical approaches help create national
indentieties
Correct your spelling
identities
.
On the other hand
,
young
Add an article
the young
a young
show examples
citizen should have their
Correct your spelling
freedom
freedoms
freedome
Correct your spelling
freedom
in order to be creative and develop themselves as well as the country.
For instance
, Lisa
blackpink
Change the capitalization
Blackpink
show examples
, a Thai singer who is now put her dream in Korea. She does not conserve Thai culture.
moreover
, cher adopts Korean culture and
accept
Correct subject-verb agreement
accepts
show examples
it very well. After 10 years, she is currently considered one of the most famous
singer
Change to a plural noun
singers
show examples
in the world. It can be seen that the young should create their own paths and follow them with great
motivations
Fix the agreement mistake
motivation
show examples
. In conclusion, following
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tradition helps improve relationships between generations. I think that children should have the
Correct your spelling
freedom
freedome
Correct your spelling
freedom
to choose how they behave.
Submitted by thaothanh1323 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: