IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think the government should focus on improving the economy of the country. Other people think that government should focus on social services such as health and education programs. Which statement do you agree with? Explain and provide examples to support your opinion.

#people #government #focus #economy #country #services #health #education #programs #support
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement,
government
Use synonyms
 should focus only economy. Many countries focus to develop economies
instead
Linking Words
 of spending
money
Use synonyms
 on the public care sector.
This
Linking Words
 may lead to citizens' problems with spending
money
Use synonyms
 on hospitals. The
government
Use synonyms
 is running on the economy, if there is no investment in development, can't generate
money
Use synonyms
. If there is no proper transportation and utility
people
Use synonyms
 can't spend their
money
Use synonyms
, It will be with them.
However
Linking Words
, leaders should acknowledge what their citizmakeethe ed and make ready with that plans,
Instead
Linking Words
 of without proper knowledge. More industries make the country wealthy by paying taxes to employers and employees. Many
people
Use synonyms
 secure their jobs and enhance their living requirements. And
this
Linking Words
 may lead to proper education in the development of universities. As well as, the administration should spend
money
Use synonyms
 on the public
health
Use synonyms
 sector too.
For Instance
Linking Words
, every country has faced bad experiences with Covid 19 virus pandemic. In some countries unable to maintain proper hospital utilities
such
Linking Words
 as the required medical team, equipment, and medicines, and these are caused to death rate high. Everyone can't afford medical treatments, in
this
Linking Words
 case, authorities should support the
people
Use synonyms
.
Government
Use synonyms
 should spend
money
Use synonyms
 on their national
health
Use synonyms
 awareness programs. Nowadays, most
people
Use synonyms
 are affected by cholesterol, blood pressure, heart problems, and diabetes. For these types of
health
Use synonyms
 issues
government
Use synonyms
 should build parks, walking tracks, and gymnasiums and utilize these properly.
Finally
Linking Words
, I agree that
government
Use synonyms
 should have a plan to develop the economy and as well maintain hospitals'
people
Use synonyms
's awareness of
health
Use synonyms
 care habits.
Submitted by anand.gnt92 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: