IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past 30 years that many cities in the world are now ‘one big traffic jam’. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

#car #ownership #years #cities #world #‘one #traffic #jam’ #measures #governments #people #cars
Most
people
 across the world own a car nowadays and
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
last
 30 years
traffic
 jam has massively increased. I completely agree with
this
 statement and I will elaborate on the actions that the
government
 should take to discourage
people
 from using their own vehicles. In Mauritius, most families own at least a car,
moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
show examples
 husband and wife may
also
 have each their own cars. Unfortunately,
this
 progression is causing huge roadblocks mainly for those who should go
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the capital. The
government
 has taken some measures to have trams in our country, definitely reducing
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
te
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
traffic
 jams. Adding up, our local authorities have doubled the price of petrol, resulting
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
lesser usage of cars. Now, we can see that many
people
 are opting for
car pooling
Correct your spelling
carpooling
show examples
 which I do practice as it
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
 the number of cars on the road In China, the
government
 has
use
Change the verb form
used
show examples
 another methodology,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is providing bikes to the population so that they may move
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 towns. The advantage of
this
 method is that it reduces
traffic
 jams,
people
 are healthier and it reduces pollution. Personally, I believe that the
government
 should find more measures to reduce
traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
. More trams and facilities
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 public transport should be available to
people
 at
more
Add an article
a more
the more
show examples
 regular time and in different areas. Each
people
 should analyse whether they really need to drive short distances or will it be better to ride a bike.
Submitted by amandachokupermal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: