some people believe that charities should help people in need no matter where those people are in the world/ Others feel that those organizations should only serve the people living in the country where they are based. discuss both sides and give your opinion

Nowadays, a large number of
charities
are helping an enormous number of
people
globally. Some
people
advise that
charities
should help
people
in need no matter where they are from in the world,
while
other
people
claim that those fund
organisations
should only help the
people
living in their domestic country. In
this
essay, I will look at both views and I will explain my reasons why I think that
organisations
should help the community globally
along with
in domestic country is better. On the one hand, there are many reasons why
charities
should donate
money
and other essentials to the public globally,
this
is because some undeveloped
countries
do not get proper subsidies and lifestyles from their poor government.
For example
, Congo, one of the
countries
in central Africa with low GDP and 70% of
people
living below the poverty line
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
for that reason, recently "Give India" a big fund organisation in India helped them by sending 500 million dollars and food for them, which helps the public to fulfil their basic need from that help.
Also
, sometimes
donators
Correct your spelling
donors
show examples
want to spend their
money
on non-profit
organisations
to help
people
globally it is a great idea to send their
money
to international
organisations
, which helps them to give their profit to other
people
.
On the other hand
, some individuals claim that those
charities
should only serve the
people
belonging to the nation where the
charities
are based,
this
is because sometimes that
money
sent to other nations they terminated in fraud for that reason, some NGOs only serve the
people
in their own nation.
For example
, "Sightsavers" is the Indian
No
Correct your spelling
No.
show examples
1 NGO that only helps
people
who belong to India and help needy
people
domestically by visiting their places and meeting face-to-face, which help to make their life much better and standard.
Furthermore
, it is much
easy
Correct word choice
easier
show examples
to donate
money
in domestic
countries
we can see our naked eyes and our community's difficulties and have many opportunities to help them in their difficult situations.
To conclude
, after considering all, I think that NGOs should help
people
in the domestic
countries
as well as
outside of the nation both are important and many chances to help poor
people
and make their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
much better and standard.
Submitted by azone2646 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument and expressing a clear opinion. However, the points presented lack depth and development. Ensure to provide more detailed and well-supported arguments for each perspective.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay lacks clear logical progression, especially in the introduction and conclusion. Work on organizing the ideas and structuring the essay to enhance coherence and cohesion. Additionally, use transition words to improve the flow of ideas and connect the paragraphs more effectively.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: