Shops should not be allowed to sell any food or drinks that have been scientifically proven to be bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#shops #food #drinks #people’s #health

Government

should not allow food industries and local

shops

, if they find it is not good for

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

health

then

they should not permit the particular

shops

This

essay discusses why I strongly agree with the statement. There are two main reasons, why harmful food products should not allow their product to sell in the market.

firstly

, people

consuming

Wrong verb form

consume

show examples

more fast foods and carbonated drinks even when they do not know

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

how it is made and what

are

Change the verb form

show examples

the substance added

Change preposition

show examples

the food. It is not their fault because due to

the

Change the word

their

show examples

busy schedule they did not have time to research

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

what they eat. In fact, if

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

takes regular inspections in the

shops

then

they can easily ban the

shops

which are causing

health

issues.

Secondly

Majority

Correct article usage

the Majority

show examples

of the local

shops

do not have

proper

Add an article

the proper

show examples

licence from the

government

to run their business and

also

they are not put any labels

about

Change preposition

show examples

their

Change the word

the

show examples

ingredients that they added

Change preposition

show examples

their product. There are

lot

Change the article

a lot

show examples

of young children drinking

carnbonated

Correct your spelling

carbonated

drinks

and

Correct word choice

which

show examples

causing

Wrong verb form

causes

show examples

health

issues. To summarise

this

topic,

Government

should not

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

allow

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

shops

that

causing

Wrong verb form

cause

show examples

health

issues

Submitted by TAMIZH012 on Sun Sep 04 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

192 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Regulations
accountability
retailers
public health
consumer choice
diet
banning
health education
awareness campaigns
economic impact
job losses
small businesses
complexity
beneficial
harmful
quantity consumed
individual health conditions

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
International tourism has led to a huge increase in the number of visitors to many historical sites around the world. To what extent is this a positive or negative phenomenon.
Some argue that the number of foreign tourists visiting historical places are increasing worldwide. This essay believes that this is completely a positive phenomenon because it helps with cultural preservation and improve the economy of the country.
7.5
band
Influence of human beings on the world ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of biodiversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio diversity? What solution can you suggest?
Human-related activities have infiltrated almost every aspect of the world's dynamics, disrupting the environment's flora and fauna by eradicating the biodiversity of certain species. It is my contention that while there are solid triggering factors that exacerbate existing conditions, numerous resolutions are in place to eliminate the shortcomings.
5.5
band
Some people believe that in 100 years time life will be easier for the majority of people, while others are unsure about this. What is your opinion?
Scientists are in the quest of making people’s life comfortable and easier. Taking this into the consideration many people believe that life will be more prosperous after century. However, some ethnic groups are uncertain about the same notion. I believe that automation would overrun this world within several decades and make people’s life comfortable, easier, luxurious and therefore enjoyable, but natural resource might get obsolete and global warming problems will greatly arise.
7
band
Space travel to the Moon is often cited as one giant leap for mankind. Yet some people argue that this achievement made little difference to our daily lives. What is your opinion?
The evolution of humans has been manifested by our innovations and the will for further growth, and for years despite the need for survival and sustainability, inquisitiveness has played a paramount contribution to our lives, thus for years of accumulating and contributing to the pool of science and knowledge, human has achieved to reach a great leap and has reached the moon. However, people have polarized such achievements and some pronounce these achievements to be trivial. I will argue that this. I will argue that such comments are irrelevant
4.5
band
Some people consider prices as most important thing to think about when buying product (such as cell phone) or service (eg. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree
Over the last two or three decades, product's price has increased rapidly as compared to the past. However, Some think that product's cost is the utmost important to think about when buy things. I partially agree with this statement and this essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.

Shops should not be allowed to sell any food or drinks that have been scientifically proven to be bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

International tourism has led to a huge increase in the number of visitors to many historical sites around the world. To what extent is this a positive or negative phenomenon.

Influence of human beings on the world ecosystem is leading to the extinction of species and loss of biodiversity. What are the primary causes of loss of bio diversity? What solution can you suggest?

Some people believe that in 100 years time life will be easier for the majority of people, while others are unsure about this. What is your opinion?

Space travel to the Moon is often cited as one giant leap for mankind. Yet some people argue that this achievement made little difference to our daily lives. What is your opinion?

Some people consider prices as most important thing to think about when buying product (such as cell phone) or service (eg. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree