In today's world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#world #people #money #appearance #happen #development

Nowadays, advertisement and marketing are the most efficient ways to command the public. The fashion industry is

also

utilizing the same to boost its

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

. In my opinion,

people

spending a considerable amount on costumes either because of commercials or an urge to get praised for their appearance is not good progress. The below-stated views can justify my belief. To commence with, social media marketing and digital ads are usual trends to reach out to a large audience. Industries that produce cosmetics or other add-ons for costumes influence their customers through some kind of promotions or offers.

For example

, organisations use popular celebrities to endorse their product on various occasions in order to leverage

people

Therefore

people

used to spend extra bucks to match their looks with their dearest celebrity.

Moreover

people

have a natural urge to

get

Verb problem

show examples

applauded for their accomplishments. In today's world, looking younger is considered an achievement and everyone wants to be adored for it. Individuals are ready to pay

out

Change preposition

apply

show examples

money to look younger.

For instance

, a lady in the United Kingdom has gone through 26 cosmetic surgeries to look

alike

Correct your spelling

show examples

a Barbie doll.

Hence

, getting praised for their outfits and appearances is leading mankind to spend a lot of money.

To conclude

, a company's marketing and desire to be praised plays an important role in

people

spending money on outfits.

Also

, the aforementioned points clearly indicate that it

Verb problem

has

show examples

a negative impact on society.

Submitted by deepaknardia98 on Sun Sep 11 2022

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coherence and cohesion

Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines the main points that will be discussed in the essay.

task response

Provide a more comprehensive response to the prompt, addressing both positive and negative aspects and providing a balanced view.

Word Count

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

240 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In today's world, people spend a lot of money on appearance because they want to look younger. Why does this happen? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Word Count

With the increased global demand in oil and gas, undiscovered area of the world should be opened up to access more resourced. To what extent do you agree?

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smartphones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Companies should provide sports and social facilities for local communities. To what extent do you agree.

It is better for people to be unemployed than being employed with a job they do not enjoy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You see an advertisement for a course and would like to enquire about it.