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Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that several short holidays from school are better, while others think one long summer holiday for the year is better for children. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and relevant examples from your experience.

#people #holidays #school #summer #holiday #year #children
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Holidays help the
children
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 to get a break from education. Some people believe that
children
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 should get a short vacation from school often
instead
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 of long
summer
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 holidays. In my
opinion
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,opinion
show examples
children
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 ought to get a long
summer
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 vacation that would help the
children
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 to involve in other activities apart from education.
This
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 essay will discuss both views in the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
following paragraph.
Firstly
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 , It's important for offspring to get festival sometimes. In short holidays,
heir
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an heir
the heir
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 can get refreshments from school education and they don't need to wait
the
Change preposition
until the
show examples
 end of the year to do something.
For example
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, they can plan several small events during the short celebration.
On the other hand
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 , If the youngster gets a long break in the year , It will help them to involve in
long term
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long-term
show examples
 activities , without worrying about homework from school.
Moreover
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,
children
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 can go on
summer
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 vacation and register for other activities like
summer
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 camp , singing classes and so on. In my conclusion,
children
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 should get
Submitted by subme216 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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