IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Most high level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. Do you agree?

#level #positions #companies #men #workforce #countries #percent #percentage #women
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Men are preferred by most companies to fill
positions
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 in higher-level management. Corporations think that
women
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 don't have the ability to deal with
work
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 pressure despite most of the female candidates showing extraordinary performance in the workplace. I partially agree that
,
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apply
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companies should allocate a certain percentage of
positions
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 to
women
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 as it would help the
women
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 and men to contribute equally towards organizational growth .
However
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 certain
positions
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 need to be filled based on experience and skills. The organization usually recruit candidates based on their skills , experiences and qualifications. Because , If the vacancy is forced to fill by an unqualified person , It will harm the company's profits as well as its reputation.
In addition
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, qualified
people
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 can manage the
people
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 who
work
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 under them and are able to perform a task inefficient way.
Thus
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 , It's necessary to hire
people
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 based on qualifications.
On the other hand
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, organizations ought to give chances to
women
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 to
work
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 in higher
positions
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. It will help to avoid discrimination between
women
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 and men in the workplace.
For example
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. If
women
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 assign roles in senior management , they can get opportunities to prove their talent.
As a result
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, it would provide a balanced
work
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 environment among working
people
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.
Moreover
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 , It will encourage other
women
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 to reach a high level. In conclusion, Even though, a position needs to be filled based on their skill. It's important to allocate a certain percentage to
women
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 as it will help the
women
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 survive in society.
Submitted by subme216 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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