In many countries women no longer feel the need to het married some people believe that this is because women are able to that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security That marriage can bring To what extend do you agree

İn many countries
women
do not need to get married. Some individuals think that
because
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
women
can earn
her
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
salary and
therefore
do not need the financial support that
marriage
brings. I do not agree with
this
opinion because
marriage
is necessary for good communication and sustaining
family
Add an article
the family
a family
show examples
.
Firstly
,
marriage
is not
obligation
Add an article
an obligation
show examples
but it is essential.
Women
earns
Change the verb form
earn
show examples
money
or not they need
marriage
for
maining
Correct your spelling
remaining
mining
family. Research carried out by CNN revealed that getting married is
indispensable
Add an article
an indispensable
show examples
thing for
people
. İf
people
do not married they will not make a family. Life would be difficult without family. In my opinion, İf individuals do not marry
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
will
Correct your spelling
influence
influenced
influnce
Add a missing verb
be influnce
show examples
by it.
For example
, the world population will decrease and immigration will increase because every country will need a community.
Secondly
,
women
can earn
money
without financial support but they need to life
partner
Fix the agreement mistake
partners
show examples
to
being
Change the form of the verb
be
show examples
happy.
An extensive
Remove the article
Extensive
show examples
research conducted by CNBC revealed that the biggest
sadness
Replace the word
sad
show examples
reason is being lonely.
People
need to
someone
for talking ,love and spend time
.
Change preposition
with.
show examples
The best way is
marry
Change the verb form
to marry
marrying
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
someone
.
for
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
if
people
were lonely they can not find
someone
to spend time
therefor
Correct your spelling
therefore
show examples
they need to marry. Earning
money
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
not change
this
circumstance because
money
does not untangle some type of problems.
People
are exceptional they can not solve
Add an article
the problem
a problem
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
without
life
Add an article
a life
show examples
partner.
people
should find who is very trustworthy afterwards they should marry
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
him or her. To conclude, being unmarried and earning
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
own
money
can not solve all
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
therefore
,
people
need to marry
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
someone
for sustaining family and happiness.
Submitted by brsson06 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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