IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people consider price as the most important thing to think about when buying product (such as cell phone) or services (e.g. medical treatment). Do you agree or disagree?

#people #price #product #cell #phone #services #e #g #treatment
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Price is considered
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 main reason by some people when they buy
Fix the agreement mistake
something
show examples
somethings
Correct your spelling
something
show examples
 or get some
services
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 others argue quality should be the most important for them due to numerous cases. I agree with the former view. On one hand, all people are aware that economic downturn leads to goods and
services
Use synonyms
risen
Wrong verb form
rising
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, most merchants are finding the solution to reduce
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
a product
show examples
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 or
Use synonyms
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
, it affects
buyer
Fix the agreement mistake
buyers
show examples
 when they buy
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. A good illustration of
this
Linking Words
 is certain merchants cheat
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 fake
Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 or low quality.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, certain
service
Use synonyms
 providers have bad manner
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 someone who
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
 the
service
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, both reasons are what makes commoners demand quality
first
Linking Words
 even
it’s
Correct word choice
if it’s
show examples
 expensive.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
most
Add an article
the most
show examples
 population in the world cannot afford expensive products or
services
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, they are finding anything cheaper
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they can afford
even
Correct pronoun usage
it even
show examples
it
Correct word choice
if it
show examples
 has
risk
Add an article
a risk
the risk
show examples
 to receive fraudulent or ineffective goods
or
Change preposition
in or
show examples
 bad
manner
Fix the agreement mistake
manners
show examples
. Since they think it can use and satisfy when
receive
Change the verb form
receiving
show examples
 it.
Moreover
Linking Words
, those who have
Add an article
a solution
the solution
show examples
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
 to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem by building a community share
review
Fix the agreement mistake
reviews
show examples
 of the
product
Use synonyms
 or
service
Use synonyms
 to advise a man to buy them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, a number of merchants use these communities to advertise their products or
services
Use synonyms
. To conclude, most of the
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
 on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Earth prefer
Use synonyms
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 or
Use synonyms
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
 of which
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cost
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 cheaper as they can afford and
current
Correct article usage
the current
show examples
 economic forces them to save their money for
emergency
Add an article
an emergency
show examples
case
Fix the agreement mistake
cases
show examples
 or provide
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their family members.
Submitted by amittawin on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: