Successful professional athletes can earn much more than people in other important professions, such as nurses, doctors and teacher.Someone considers it quite justified, and someone considers it unfair.To what extent tdo you agree or disagree?

#athletes #people #professions #nurses #doctors #teacher #someone #tdo

It is true that the wages received by some successful professional

Correct your spelling

athletes

atheletes

Correct your spelling

athletes

are more than that of other professionals. Some people find it unjustifiable, and I

also

consider myself to be one. In my opinion, I believe that other professionals should be highly regarded and should be more well compensated than these professional athletes.

First

of all, giving more regard to

athetes

Correct your spelling

athletes

than other professionals

such

as nurses, doctors, teachers, and policemen, will only discourage the younger generation to pursue the latter mentioned professions.

This

is due to the reason that being in the sports industry is more pleasurable as compared to being in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

risky jobs mentioned.

For instance

, playing basketball could be most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

men

Change noun form

men's

show examples

pastime hobby. If they will be given an opportunity to do their hobby and at the same time earn more,

then

, the tendency is they will be withdrawn to pursuing other purposeful work.

Moreover

Submitted by eyeteaser_18 on Sat Oct 15 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

153 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Successful professional athletes can earn much more than people in other important professions, such as nurses, doctors and teacher.Someone considers it quite justified, and someone considers it unfair.To what extent tdo you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

The number of people who are at the risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What are the reasons for growth in the overweight people in the society. How can this problem be solved.

In many countries, people now wear western clothes (suits, jeans) rather than the traditional clothing. Why? (Reasons and relevant examples) Is this a positive or negative development?

Education, from preschool through university, should be paid for by the government and therefore free to students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In today's world, the spread of computer use has changed our way of living so that people can buy many things through the Internet. Discuss some advantages and disadvantages of Internet shopping.