Some people think that outdoor activities are more beneficial for children’s development than playing computer games. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Today
with
the developing world majority of the Change preposition
in
children
around the globe tend to interact with internet Use synonyms
games
or social media Use synonyms
games
. Half of the Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
mankind
man kind
believes that playing Correct your spelling
mankind
outdoor
provides more benefits for Replace the word
outdoors
the
youngsters than engaging in electronic Correct article usage
apply
games
. From my Use synonyms
perspective
I am convinced by the former idea and I agree Add a comma
,perspective
to
that Change preposition
with
Correct your spelling
statement
statment
. I will outline the main points for my agreement in the Correct your spelling
statement
ensuring
paragraphs.
Correct your spelling
ensuing
To commence
Fix the infinitive
Commence
with
, outdoor recreations are advantageous for Change preposition
apply
children
Use synonyms
under
two main reasons. Change preposition
for
Firstly
it improves the physical fitness of the younger generation and develops their limbs and borns. As an example, when I was in Sri Lanka my Linking Words
Linking Words
next door
neighbour's child was strong and Add a hyphen
next-door
well built
because every day at school he was participating in Add a hyphen
well-built
Correct your spelling
extracurricular
extra curricular
activities which Correct your spelling
extracurricular
is
connected to different types of sports. Change the verb form
are
Besides
physical development, outdoor entertainments build social interaction with other peers and Linking Words
children
enhance their communication Use synonyms
skills
Use synonyms
as well as
Add the comma(s)
, as well as children,
children
develop their own communities.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, even though playing computer Linking Words
games
, Use synonyms
broaden
a Correct subject-verb agreement
broadens
Correct your spelling
child's
childs
brain in various aspects, Change to a genitive case
child's
such
as Linking Words
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
skills
and thinking Use synonyms
skills
, it Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
make
an individual weak Change the verb form
makes
from
their own body. According to a survey conducted in Sri Lanka, 75% of Sri Lankan Change preposition
in
children
are suffering from diseases Use synonyms
such
as high obesity and diabetes, because these Linking Words
children
were entertaining themselves Use synonyms
by
the use of various devices.
To sum up, I believe that Change preposition
with
children
should spend their time playing Use synonyms
outdoor
rather than sticking their hands and eyes on a computer or any other device because it will lead them Replace the word
outdoors
for
a healthy lifestyle and develop social Change preposition
to
skills
.Use synonyms
Submitted by wathsala.lekamge1997 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite