Television has diminished the free time of people. It can make people lazy and not socialize with others. Do you agree or disagree?

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In
this
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contemporary era,Television has become a vital source of
entertainment
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.
However
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,it occupied
family's
Correct article usage
the family's
show examples
precious
time
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and made them less active.
Moreover
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,individuals spend most of their
time
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in front of
this
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entertainment
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box and the need for communication with others is highly decreased.I completely agree with
this
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notion and going to elaborate on my stand in
this
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essay.
To begin
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with,most public
spend
Change the verb form
spends
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their leisure day watching their favourite movies or sports on television.
Moreover
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,
entertainment
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companies have found a way to mesmerise their subscribers to watch their channels and tend to increase their market value.
Also
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,the increasing count and variety of channels made
people
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sit and watch for a stipulated period of
hour
Add an article
an hour
show examples
.These situations made
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
procrastinate doing their normal activities.
Further
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, the day every individual spends with their friends and families gets lessened. To add,Due to harsh weather conditions in most countries, most
people
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prefer to stay indoors rather than go outside.
This
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situation allows society to search for their amusement inside their homes and engaged
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
playing games and watching their favourite team play.In reality,these activities eat a huge amount of their
time
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and make them less active.
Moreover
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, a lot of news channels are providing their updates 24/7 and make
people
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sit watching their critical headlines.
Also
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,
people
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are eager to know about the political and economic situations around the world.
Hence
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,
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
are tied to
this
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entertainment
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source.
This
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may cause disputes among families and they are unable to spend their
time
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with their children. To conclude,Television occupied our precious
time
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and productivity and made us a less social community.
Submitted by stevejegan on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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