Some people think that having a set retirement age (e.g. 65 years) for everybody, regardless of occupation is unfair. They believe that certain workers deserve to retire and receive a pension at an earlier age. Do you agree or disagree? Which type of workers do you think should benefit from early retirement?

Retirement

Use synonyms

age

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is when every working individual takes a break from

work

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and gets paid for the services they have done for their association. Some sociologists believe that having a fixed

retirement

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age

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for everybody, irrespective of occupation, is unfair, and certain

workers

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should be allowed to retire early. I agree with

this

Linking Words

argument and will indicate my view with examples.

To begin

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with, people tend to become weak as they grow older. Different occupations demand different kinds of skills. Certain

workers

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need physical strength to perform their duties.

This

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physical strength and stamina reduce with

age

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. While other professions, like office

work

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, demand less physical energy.

Hence

Linking Words

workers

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whose

work

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requires more physical energy need to be given early

retirement

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This

Linking Words

can be illustrated by the

workers

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in the coal mine whose

work

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demands strength and stamina, which deteriorates as they grow older.

However

Linking Words

workers

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sitting in a library do not need to have much physical power.

Additionally

Linking Words

, people who have served a lot for a

company

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for a longer duration could be given early

retirement

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. Certain

workers

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who have dedicated most of their life working for a

company

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should be allowed to reap the benefits of

retirement

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at an early

age

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For instance

Linking Words

, my father started working for a

company

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in India at 20. He was allowed to retire early by considering his

work

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tenure in the

company

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. In conclusion, having a typical

retirement

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age

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for all

workers

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is unfair.

Workers

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whose

work

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demands more physical energy and who have served their

company

Use synonyms

longer should be allowed to retire early.

pabhi163

Oct 21, 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays, people store knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some people are fond of buying new gadgets phones or laptop is this a good or bad thing discuss your opinion

Some people think it is better for one single legal system throughout the world. Others say countries should have their own laws. Discuss both views and give your opinion.