Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the government of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#improvements #health #education #trade #development #nations #government #responsibility #areas

In many less developed

countries

around the world, the essential public sections like healthcare, education and business are in urgent need

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

improved

Replace the word

improvement

show examples

to make sure these parts are functioning well. Some people think it is the duty of those rich nations to help the poorer

countries

such

areas. I tend not to agree with

this

notion. For many rich

governments

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,governments

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the priority of their jobs should be to guarantee the

Correct your spelling

welfare

wellfare

Correct your spelling

welfare

and benefits of

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

own citizens.

Government

Add an article

The government

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collects

tax

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taxes

show examples

from the hard-working citizens, so it should pay the money back to them,

for example

improving

Change preposition

by improving

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medical care, building more public transportation facilities, rising the pension or

Correct your spelling

welfare

wellfare

Correct your spelling

welfare

funds to help the aged and the

disadvanged

Correct your spelling

disadvantaged

groups to enjoy a higher level of living standard, investing money in researching fields to boost the development of technology. Out of all of these, a government do have some degree of duty to take care of the others;

however

this

should be

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show examples

the bottom of its agenda. In fact, the reasons why a country is less-developed can be many, but

without

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apply

show examples

Correct your spelling

sufficient

sufficent

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sufficient

donation

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donations

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from rich

countries

has never been one of the main accounts.

In other words

the

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apply

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assistance from rich

countries

is not the one-for-all medicine to fully take a poorer country up. The effective treatment maybe

lie

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lies

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in anti-corruption, improving

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

general literacy, or

alter

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altering

show examples

some deep-rooted mindsets of the citizens. For many

countries

around the world which are rich in natural resources, it is a puzzle why they never escape from poverty.

However

, if you look at their literacy rate and the governmental corruption rank, you will probably know the answer. In conclusion, I don't think it is the duty

for

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the rich to help the poorer

countries

, as why they are poor is not because of

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of assistance from the rich.

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Furthermore

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Further more

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Furthermore

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, international institutes like

Correct article usage

the UN

show examples

and the World Bank are the ones that the poor

countries

can turn to.

Submitted by uberreceipants on Mon Oct 31 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

328 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

essential
development
poorer nations
government
richer nations
responsibility
assistance
capacity
resources
collaboration
effective
sustainable
shared
non-governmental organizations
empowering
local governments
communities
investing
infrastructure
capacity-building
financial aid
technical expertise
knowledge transfer
improvement

What to do next:

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Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the government of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people believe that international tourism is a bad thing for their country. What are the reasons behind this view? What are the solutions to change it?

Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Other people think that it is a fault of the parents. Discuss both side and give your opinion

Many people go through life doing work that they hate or have no talent for. Why does this happen? What are the consequences of this situation? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Since the 18th century technological advances have replaced people in the workplace. With today’s technology this process is happening at a greater rate. Technology is increasingly responsible for unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You recently sent some documents by post, but they did not arrive. Write a letter to the post manager. In your letter Give details of the situation Describe the documents Say what action you want the post office to take.