IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people argue that it is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #job #money #salary #life
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The decision on which
Correct your spelling
career
carrier
carreer
Correct your spelling
career
 path to follow is somehow vital in a person's
life
Use synonyms
. Many consider job offering
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 salary will guarantee a more fulfilling
life
Use synonyms
. Others believe that joy and working satisfaction is the key factors
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 choosing an occupation. It is undoubtful that big money rewards from well-paid job help us to have a better
life
Use synonyms
 quality.
For instance
Linking Words
, families with high incomes are eligible
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 better health care services or they can just use the wage to buy themselves
convenience
Change the noun form
conveniences
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such
Linking Words
 as smart home appliances or hiring
Correct article usage
a housemaid
show examples
housemaid
Fix the agreement mistake
housemaids
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. I believe
life
Use synonyms
 may not be happier for those but it will definitely be easier. Even when they are not satisfied with their profession, they can use the payment to fill their moments apart from task time with exciting things
such
Linking Words
 as a luxury vacation or buying high-end belongings.
However
Linking Words
, money is not the right motivation for a person to get over obstacles and achieve
Correct your spelling
career
carreer
Correct your spelling
career
 goals. My friend who just left his million-dollar manager position to start working as a freelancer said that he lacked the feeling of achievement in the tasks he does every day and was fed up with the heavy workloads. It can be said that having an occupation that you enjoy will provide
stress
Correct article usage
a stress
show examples
 and worry-free
life
Use synonyms
 where
Correct your spelling
career
carreer
Correct your spelling
career
 obstacles are just another exciting challenge. As far as I am concerned, it may be impossible to find an enjoyable stint that offers a high salary so one should know what to exchange and understand the consequences
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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