IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that people in senior positions alone should make decisions in a business, while others think that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals think, solutions to problems in a
business
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 should be only taken by senior position
professionals
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, while others think junior
employees
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also
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 should take a part in it. In
this
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 essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will be discussing why senior
professionals
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 are good at decision-making and why junior
professionals
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 should take part in it.
Firstly
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, Senior
professionals
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 are very experienced. Previously, they would have faced many kinds of issues, if the
business
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 hit with a problem, they knew what and when actions should be taken.
Moreover
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, they have greater communication skills so they can make others easily understand the circumstance. Basically, analytical thinking is high for them because of that, decision-making is a piece of cake and the amount of money that should be spent to tackle the problem is well known. They may know every nook and corner of their competitive businesses and how to protect from them. Junior
employees
Use synonyms
 are the
next
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generation
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 so training them is very important for the
next
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generation
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 of the
business
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. Involving them to make decisions helps them to gain more experience and to learn strategies from senior
professionals
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.
Although
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 junior
employees
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 lack experience and are afraid to make decisions, sometimes they may give some unique ideas to tackle the issue. One great example of
this
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 scenario is google. In my opinion, senior
professionals
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 are very good at decision-making and have good analytical thinking.
However
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, junior
employees
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 are the
next
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generation
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 so teaching them to how to think may help the
business
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 for the upcoming
generation
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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