IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The plan below show the layout of a university's sports centre now and how it will look after redevelopment. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#plan #show #layout #university #sports #centre #redevelopment #summarise #information #features #comparisons
Here, we can see there are
two
 architectural plans that represent the present and after look of a university
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
centre
. The top layout is for the present look of the
sports
centre
. We can see that it is so simple
Add the particle
to compare
show examples
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to the bottom layout
that is
 planned for redevelopment. There are three parts: one is the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 building and the rest
twos
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 are outdoor courts that surround the
centre
 building. A 25m
pool
 along with a
gym
 at the backside, a seating
area
, a changing
room
 and a space for
reception
Add an article
a reception
the reception
show examples
 at the entrance of the building
summerize
Correct your spelling
summarize
show examples
 the
centre
builing
Correct your spelling
building
. At the bottom, it represents the
future
Correct your spelling
scenario
scenerio
Correct your spelling
scenario
 of the
sports
centre
. If we closely look, we see that the
future
plan
 is the extended version of the central main building. Almost All of the facilities of
before
Correct article usage
the before
show examples
plan
 are present here except the
two
 outdoor courts. In the before, at the entrance part of the
building
Add a comma
,building
show examples
 there was only a reception
area
 but in
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
plan
,
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the left
side
 of
entrance
Correct article usage
the entrance
show examples
 we see a
sports
 shop and
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the right
side
, there is situated a cafe.
At
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the left
side
 of a
sports
 shop in the
Add a hyphen
south-west
show examples
south
Correct your spelling
southwest
show examples
west
corner
Add a comma
,corner
show examples
 there is another
room
 for changing space. The changing
room
 has
two
 doors
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
west
 and east
side
. From the
west
door
Add a comma
,door
show examples
 we can enter into
leisure
Correct article usage
the leisure
show examples
pool
that is
 situated
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
west
side
 of
swimming
Add an article
the swimming
a swimming
show examples
pool
.
At
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the right
side
 of
seating
Correct article usage
the seating
show examples
room
Add a comma
,room
show examples
 there is a
sports
 hall. From the cafe door, if we go to
right
Add an article
the right
show examples
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the east we see a corridor that goes straight to the east and turns left at
north
Add an article
the north
show examples
. At the end of the
corridor
Add a comma
,corridor
show examples
 we see the
gym
area
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the north
side
 of
swimming
Add an article
the swimming
a swimming
show examples
pool
. The
area
 of
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
 is extended in the
future
plan
. If we go out from
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
show examples
room
,
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the left
side
 of
corridor
Add an article
the corridor
show examples
 there are
two
 dance studios
that
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 situated
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the east
side
 of
building
Add an article
the building
a building
show examples
. From the
two
 plans of
university
Correct article usage
the university
show examples
sports
centre
, we see the total
area
 is
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
. The
area
 is not extended but the central building is extended by removing the outdoor courts for redevelopment.
Submitted by joyzafree on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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