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Band 5.5

Some feel that punishment should focus more on rehabilitation instead of long prison terms. Other feel prison terms are important for social stability . Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#feel #punishment #focus #rehabilitation #prison #terms #stability
It goes without saying that, every offence should be
punishment
 inevitable. As far as I know , the government carrying about delinquency,
likewise
 shoplifting, murdering, corruption and so on . As a matter of ,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fact some people think and believe that
punishment
 should be concentrated on rehabilitation as an alternative to locking them up in
prison
 .
However
, others feel
prison
 expression is vital and crucial for society . It is indubitable that , if the guilty had done a minor crime
such
 as thieving money the government would have relieved the penalty,
accordingly
this
 matter criminals should appeal to public works or community services, suchlike to sweep the streets or pick the litter. In general,
this
 process can helpful for society.
In addition
, the lawbreakers probably or must go to a psychologist for rectification of their outlooks and support to overcome their difficulties. Turning to the other side of the argument, Unfortunately, there are felonious crimes
for example
 murder, kidnapping and abduction, in
this
 ,case the
punishment
 must be severe, due to these penalties would be sample to follow the law and ground rules . More importantly , some individuals are naturally criminals which is why without justification the authority must be shut down in
prison
 undeniably .
Nonetheless
, after a long life in ,
prison
 some criminals continue their crimes, namely, It is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
diverse
effects
Correct the article-noun agreement
effect
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 on their physical and emotional life is being worse . In my opinion, despite the polar views I totally agree that every minor or particularly serious crime must be
punishment
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
inevitable ,
otherwise
 in
Add an article
the
show examples
community starts disturbances
Submitted by uluga2002 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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