IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You would like to be work in a different city to be closer to your family. Write a letter to your employer to request a transfer to another office. In the letter: - Explain why you would like to move - Request that your employer place you in a specific city - Request that it be completed by a certain date Write at least 150 words.

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Dear Sir,
This
Linking Words
 is Amar Mehta working in the Marketing department as a Senior Sales Officer. I am writing
this
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 letter to request my transfer to the newly opened office in
Ahmedabad
Use synonyms
.
To begin
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 with, I would like to inform you that
Ahmedabad
Use synonyms
 is my home town and my parents stay alone there. Since my father's health is not well and I am the only person to look after him, I have to frequently travel during weekends to
Ahmedabad
Use synonyms
 . As our company is planning to open a new office in
Ahmedabad
Use synonyms
 and there is a position of Sales Officer, I would request you to place me there.
Although
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 I agree,
this
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 will reduce my chance for promotion but at the same time it would help me to support my family and I will be closer to them in their poor health condition. In view of the above, I would urge you to take
decision
Add an article
a decision
the decision
show examples
 and release my order of transfer by end of
this
Linking Words
 month.
Accordingly
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, I may plan my current handover activities for my colleague. I am looking forward to a positive response. Your usual cooperation is highly appreciated. Yours faithfully, Amar Mehta,

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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