Today, many people use the internet and smartphones to transfer money to friends, family, and businesses. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #internet #smartphones #transfer #money #friends #businesses #development

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In the modern era, a wide range of society uses the Internet and their mobile phones in order to conduct

businesses

Fix the agreement mistake

business

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and transmit

money

Use synonyms

to friends, household members and businesses. From my perspective,

this

Linking Words

new technology has a lot of advantages to enhance each individual’s quality of life. On the one hand, transferring

money

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via the Internet is so convenient that they can deal with numerous problems in daily life. In the past, if people wanted to transfer

money

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to someone, they had to spend a great amount of time going to the banks and doing various receipts to be able to transfer

money

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for someone. Nowadays, due to the convenience of useful applications, they can transfer everywhere

Change preposition

show examples

every time they need for several purposes.

Moreover

Linking Words

, these systems

also

Linking Words

allow them to keep

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

own records easily after transferring

money

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, people’s accounts could be put at risk due to the loopholes of these systems.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the lack of the elderly’s ignorance can lead to being easily duped by phishing emails or messages. Another negative impact is that each individual might face the situation that their private information will be leaked to the outside, which can be utilized by criminals for detrimental purposes like stealing

money

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also

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purchasing their information. @@ To conclude, each individual ought to keep calm and be cautious of potential fraud;

however

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, online

money

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transfers are a beneficial technological advancement.

Submitted by beolaho on Tue Nov 22 2022

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

239 words

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Today, many people use the internet and smartphones to transfer money to friends, family, and businesses. Is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, many people do not have enough money to access the internet. Should governments be responsible for ensuring that everyone can get access to the internet?

Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disargee?

Some people think that learning news from newspapers is the best way. Others, however, say that there are more effective ways of learning news from other media. Discuss both points of view and give your opinions

Task 2- Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statemen