IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #books #store #internet
In
this
 day and age, more and more people opt for obtaining
knowledge
 on the
internet
instead
 of storing
knowledge
 in
books
.
This
 has many merits and demerits. I am firmly convinced that using the
internet
 to access
knowledge
 has more merits than demerits. On the one hand, using the
internet
 to get
information
 and
knowledge
 has several/certain downsides.
First
, some
information
 and
knowledge
 are only published in the form of
paper
books
.
As a result
, it can be difficult for people who only use e-
books
 to access
this
information
.
For instance
, series of
books
such
 as Story Central do not have ebooks, so they must be bought in stores.
Second
, there is
lots
Correct quantifier usage
lot
show examples
 of false
information
 on the
internet
. The main reason for
this
 is that online
information
 is not usually censored. As a consequence, readers can fall victim to false
information
 and may be deceived.
On the other hand
, it is my firm belief that the upsides of storing
knowledge
 on the
internet
 are more significant.
To begin
 with, searching for
information
 on the
internet
 is more convenient than looking for
knowledge
 in
books
. People just need a phone or laptop with
internet
Add an article
an internet
show examples
 connection to access online
information
 whenever they want.
Moreover
, the price of e-
books
 is generally lower than that of
paper
books
.
This
 is mainly because the price of traditional
books
 includes the cost
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
paper
, transportation and storage.
Therefore
, it may be more economical for readers to use
paper
books
. In conclusion,
although
 getting
knowledge
 on the
internet
 has some drawbacks, I firmly believe that its benefits are more considerable.
Submitted by huynhtrucminhthu39 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: