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Band 4

Schools should not force children to learn a foreign language. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#schools #force #children #language
It is argued
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
whether
children
 should be obliged to study a new
language
. While I agree that forcing
children
 to learn a new
language
 can negatively affect them, I
also
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 that studying a foreign bring
students
 many benefits. On the one hand, I agree that the act of forcing
students
 to learn a new
language
 which is not their mother
language
 can adversely influence them. If they do not want,
this
 can negatively affect their mood, concentration and even their academic results.
For example
, if a
a
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
student is not willing to study
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
, she may feel it
boring
Add a missing verb
is boring
show examples
 and can not concentrate on studying that
language
.
On the other hand
, I
also
 believe that learning another
language
 provides
children
 with many benefits. Today, many schools and
universitites
Correct your spelling
universities
 have offered
progammes
Correct your spelling
programmes
 in English and
other
Change the wording
another language
other languages
show examples
language
.
Therefore
, learning another
language
 will be useful for
students
, especially those who want to study abroad.
Furthermore
, many international companies are searching for those who can speak a foreign
language
 fluently or at least has a degree in another
language
.
Thus
,
this
 will be a big advantage for
students
 if they want to get a job in an international company in the future. In conclusion,
although
 I agree that learning
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
show examples
language
 should not be compulsory, I
also
 believe that studying another
language
 is very beneficial for
children
Submitted by bttha.qn on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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