IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

#city #traffic #congestion
In our modern life, one of the most serious trouble is
traffic
Add an article
a traffic
show examples
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 in
large
Add an article
a large
the large
show examples
 urban
city
Fix the agreement mistake
cities
show examples
. The main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
 is that
currently
Add a comma
,currently
show examples
 everybody
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a private
Correct the article-noun agreement
a private car
private cars
show examples
cars
.
The humans
Correct article usage
Humans
show examples
 prefer to using own
cars
 on the road.
As a result
, in
big
Add an article
the big
show examples
 city
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
Add a comma
,
show examples
there are have been
Correct article usage
an increase
show examples
increase
Change the verb form
increasing
increased
show examples
number
 of
traffic
jams
. So it was controlled by
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
governments
.
First
 of all, these days
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
 have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
cars
.
Thus
, they prefer to
going
Change the verb
go
show examples
 work or study
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their own
cars
. As a
rusult
Correct your spelling
result
, there have a lot of
traffic
jams
 on the road especially in the evening and morning because
at
Add the comma(s)
,at
show examples
this
 time, everyone
go
Change the verb form
goes
show examples
 to work or study.
Moreover
, a
number
 of roads are more narrow.
For instance
, the capital of Uzbekistan is in Tashkent many individuals
complinte
Correct your spelling
complain
 to
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 for narrow streets. A difficult solution to reduce the
traffic
 jam is to limit the use of private
cars
instead
 of public transport. It is
also
 necessary to increase the price of licenses
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because if
people
 have fewer private
cars
, the
number
 of
traffic
jams
 on the roads will
also
 decrease.
For example
, in Singapore, licenses are very expensive and many
people
 have to use public transport.
In addition
, it is necessary to widen the roads and increase the
number
 of car parks. In conclusion, it can be said that one of the problems that currently
plagues
Change the verb form
plague
show examples
 the population is that
people
 should use
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
show examples
 private
cars
 to reduce
traffic
jams
 because it prevents
people
 from leaving their
cars
 on the side of the road.
Submitted by Premium Version on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • urban population
  • public transportation
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure
  • economic strength
  • consumerism
  • car ownership
  • commuting
  • peak hours
  • public transit
  • carpooling
  • ride-sharing
  • remote work
  • flexible working hours
  • cycling infrastructure
  • congestion charges
  • traffic management systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: