Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefit

Many people and children
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
Particular
Fix capitalization
particular
show examples
, love playing video
games
on their
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
. Playing
games
can be
benefitial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
to
think
Wrong verb form
thinking
show examples
in a complex way. In
this
essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will explain why
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe that there are many disadvantages that can
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the benefits. Video
games
are entertaining and educational. By playing online
games
, one can meet people from overseas, they can have opportunities to learn foreign
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
as well as
practicing
Wrong verb form
practice
show examples
those languages. According to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wikipedia
Change the capitalization
Wikipedia
show examples
for instance
, teenagers who play online
games
,
their
Add a missing verb
have their
show examples
brains
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
much sharper than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others,
Correct word choice
and its
show examples
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
will help not only
solving
Wrong verb form
solve
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
complex equations but
also
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
them timely.
This
allow
Change the verb form
allows
show examples
them to become more
confidence
Replace the word
confident
show examples
to do new tasks, the more they play
games
the more they will
gets
Change the verb form
get
show examples
to know about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
practical knowledge
such
as how to fly a helicopter by trying it virtually. Despite
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
arguments,
however
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
feel that Video
games
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
both mentally and physically. They have
tendency
Add an article
a tendency
the tendency
show examples
to win a match, if they fail to defeat the opponent teams they feel frustrated, and could not focus on their study. Some study showed that
games
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
like addiction and
its
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
will bring some common health issues
such
as, they are more likely to wear
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sunglass at
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
earlier of their age, lots of them are suffering from back pain. Some
games
are too offensive and use bad
slung
Correct your spelling
slang
show examples
,
promote
Correct word choice
and promote
show examples
nudity,
this
is why
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
we used to see bad words from teenagers. In Conclusion, it is true that
games
are useful for many
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
, while there are many
cause
Change to a plural noun
causes
show examples
that
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
mentions
Wrong verb form
mentioned
show examples
above
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the benefits that
games
offer.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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