IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both and give your opinion.

#activity #impact #plants #animals #world #people #actions #change
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays human activity causes damage to our
nature
Use synonyms
. Growth of population, industrial development, manufacturing and other aspects affect our plants and animals around the world. The problem is complex and it's not easy to find a way
how
Rephrase
apply
show examples
to compensate for
this
Linking Words
 damage, but it doesn'
t
Use synonyms
 mean we shouldn'
t
Use synonyms
 search for a possible solution. A rapid expansion of factories, energy stations, and pollution of our air is a consequence of constantly growing humanity's needs. Some countries have limited resources, and the environmental problem is significant,
meanwhile
Add a comma
meanwhile,
show examples
 other countries don'
t
Use synonyms
 care about the negative impact on our
nature
Use synonyms
 because of economic situation or a huge amount of territories. Unfortunately, the
overall
Linking Words
 interest in providing safety for our ecological situation is very low. That's why it's more likely that we will not see a rapid change
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 our environment. It's not true that people cannot make our environment better. There are many successful projects
of reducing
Change preposition
to reduce
show examples
damage to our
nature
Use synonyms
. One of them, electric cars, is sharply decreasing air pollution on whole continents.
For example
Linking Words
, Norway's government decided to remove all taxes and reduce income taxes for electric car owners. The consequence of
this
Linking Words
 strategy caused the cleanest air in Europe and now more than 75% of cars don'
t
Use synonyms
 use gas. The other example is Sweden's garbage recycling factories, which caused a full overcome of all rubbish around the country. Summing up, it's extremely difficult to make a rapid change in our environment, but every project, rather is big or small, can sharply improve our
nature
Use synonyms
's safety.
Submitted by kzdan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • negative impact
  • extinct
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • habitat destruction
  • mitigate
  • reverse
  • stricter regulations
  • protected areas
  • endangered species
  • education and awareness campaigns
  • biodiversity
  • consequences
  • renewable energy sources
  • organic farming
  • eco-tourism
  • environmental regulations
  • sustainable practices
  • natural ecosystems
  • preserve biodiversity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: