In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parent's absence. Discussion

Correct your spelling
Presence
Pressence
Correct article usage
The pressence
show examples
of
parent's
Change the noun form
parents
parent
show examples
is essential in
children
's development.
Parent's
Change noun form
Parents
show examples
have plenty of
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
show examples
to look after their
kids
. Some people said both
parent's
Change the noun form
parents
parent
show examples
have to go to
work
to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
children's
Correct pronoun usage
their children's
show examples
needs, while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
said it is not a good way to look after the
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
.
This
essay will explain
regarding
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
issue and provide a solution in the following
pharagraph
Correct your spelling
paragraph
paragraphs
. fulfilling what the
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
need is an obligation to parents. Somehow they have to do extra
work
to earn some money. And for some
families
, not only the father
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
work
Change the verb form
works
show examples
for cash,
Correct word choice
but
show examples
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
the mother does it
aswell
Correct your spelling
as well
. It
is happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
sometime with middle
lower-class
Correct word choice
and lower-class
show examples
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
. The advantages of
this
kind of family are probably they could
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
their needs and save
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money for the
kids
Change noun form
kid's
kids'
show examples
future, Whether it is for their education or others that important.
on the other hand
,
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
who
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
not have really much time with their
parent's
Change noun form
parents
show examples
while growing up
finds
Change the verb form
find
show examples
Correct article usage
a mentally
show examples
mentally
Change the word
mental
show examples
lack of support.
pressence
Correct your spelling
presence
of
parent's
Change the noun form
parents
parent
show examples
is important to
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
youth age.
Evenmore
Correct your spelling
Even more
,
kids
need guidance while growing up.
For instance
, based on
scientis
Correct your spelling
scientific
research,
teenages
Correct your spelling
teenagers
that grew up without the
pressence
Correct your spelling
presence
of their
parent's
Change noun form
parents
show examples
are finds
Change the verb form
are found
are finding
show examples
difficult to get along with society than someone who got
fully
Replace the word
full
show examples
support from their
families
. To summarize,
families
that do both parents
work
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
more financially
stabble
Correct your spelling
stable
rather than
parent's
Change noun form
parents
show examples
who does not.
However
, Most of their
kids
finds
Change the verb form
find
show examples
hard
Correct pronoun usage
it hard
show examples
to adapt
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
their environment because of
Correct pronoun usage
their parent's
show examples
parent's
Fix the agreement mistake
parents'
show examples
absence.
This
essay has
discuss
Change the verb form
discussed
show examples
which are important for
families
and
kids
. Now it is time for us to look after our
kids
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
Correct article usage
a propher
show examples
propher
Correct your spelling
proper
way.
Submitted by dhaniwicaksono26 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • dual-income households
  • standard of living
  • extra-curricular activities
  • private education
  • financial stability
  • independence
  • responsibility
  • emotional support
  • academic support
  • parental guidance
  • strain on family relationships
  • external caregivers
  • flexible working hours
  • work-from-home opportunities
  • quality time management
  • balanced approach
What to do next:
Look at other essays: