IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

some people think university education should prepare student for employment. Other people think the university has other functions. Discuss both views and what do you think the function of the university.

#people #university #education #student #employment #functions #function
It's undoubtedly true that higher education will enlighten
student's
Fix the agreement mistake
students'
show examples
 careers in the future. In recent times, many
students
 are interested in
further
 studies.
However
, some suggest a belief that university education plays a vital role to prepare
students
 to get placement in top companies, while other
people
 have opposed
this
 notion. Both views will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraph with a befitting paradigm. There is adequate evidence to agree with the meritorious side. The top-notch concrete reason is communication skills, student can collaborate with other
people
. On account of training, they change their behaviour according to
profession
Correct pronoun usage
their profession
show examples
.Another positive outlook in
this
 regard is that acquiring good grades in the academic records
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
may chance to get a place in well-reputed companies with good salary packages. Needless to say, all these points stand in good stead. What is known as half full for others may appear as empty half for some
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
 So
people
, in general, tend to distinguish that higher studies will enable
students
 to be experts in some skills.
For instance
, in order to start a business,
students
 need to understand the basic functionalities of marketing strategy. Another observation in
this
 regard, involving in other activities to showcase our talents
such
 as painting, sports etc. Not to mention, some
college
Fix the agreement mistake
colleges
show examples
 gave depth knowledge about business.
Also
, they organize a seminar
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 international business.
Hence
, it's apparent why many
people
 are in favour of
this
 trend. In recapitulation, I reiterate that there are innumerable strong factors supporting that higher studies will turn the
students
 to get knowledge in skills.
Consequently
, I firmly agree with the given statement.
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: