IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Consider that adults spend much of their lives at work, having job satisfacton is extremely important. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all employees?

#adults #lives #work #job #satisfacton #factors #satisfaction #expectation #employees
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Because we spent our
time
Use synonyms
 more than eight hours in the office, having enjoyable jobs are so pivotal. There are a few factors that contribute to
work
Use synonyms
 satisfaction which
are
Change the verb form
is
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 the love of the
job
Use synonyms
 and wage.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, it is completely hard to be satisfied with
work
Use synonyms
 nowadays. In the modern age, youths are spending their precious
time
Use synonyms
 in the office more than in their home because they are satisfied with their current occupation that matches their passion.
Moreover
Linking Words
, money is another factor that contributes to
work
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 satisfaction and
as a result
Linking Words
, it makes youngsters
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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crazier with their
job
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.
For example
Linking Words
, based on Working Life Style magazine, 60% of adults devote their
time
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 in the office from 8 AM until 8 PM due to the love of their
job
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 and they get a good salary. Even though many
workers
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 claim they are happy with their
job
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, there is a study that shows more than 50% of young employees conveyed they are being under pressure and paid under wages.
As a result
Linking Words
, they are being lazy in terms of completing the jobs on
time
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, it affects the working circumstances and brings negative impacts to the company,
such
Linking Words
 as decreasing revenue until bankruptcy.
For instance
Linking Words
, some old-style companies in rural areas have experienced business failure due to low performance shown by their employees.
Workers
Use synonyms
 had stated that they were tired to
work
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 on uninterested tasks and had paid below standard. In conclusion, having passionate jobs and being paid more is so important to
workers
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. When they get all of those, they will devote more hours to the company. Unfortunately, not all
workers
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 are having the chance to pursue an enjoyable
job
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 with
a better incomes
Correct the article-noun agreement
a better income
better incomes
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.
As a result
Linking Words
, they tend to have
a
Correct article usage
apply
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low
contributions
Correct the article-noun agreement
contribution
show examples
 to the company's profit.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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