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Band 5.5

Many food and drink prodcuts contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary Products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #prodcuts #levels #sugar #health #products #people
In today's context of the world, having a higher level of
sugar
content
 in food and beverages can be identified as the main reason to have a number of health issues.
Hence
, it can be argued that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 these
products
 should be made more expensive to discourage the community. I concur with the above statement due to the facts below.
Firstly
, modern people in the world, are struggling to make their food on their own due to their office work and busy life.
Hence
, they buy cheaper junk food which contains higher
carbohydrate
 levels as a solution.
As a result
, their
carbohydrate
 intake will be higher, which will lead to many life-threatening diseases
such
 as heart disease, diabetes etc.
Secondly
, if we take any dairy
products
 like fresh milk and cheese, the
content
 of
carbohydrate
Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
show examples
 is comparatively higher than in earlier days. The reason for
this
 could be achieving higher sales with the enhancement of taste. Because when any product tastes good humans tend to buy more. Due to
this
 people will consume
sugar
 without their knowledge. To discourage the consumption of
sugar
, the most effective way is to increase their prices. If these
products
 are expensive, only a limited number of the community will be able to
buy
Correct pronoun usage
thembuy
show examples
. Most probably the wealthy ones.
However
, given that most of these
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 are educated ,they tend to read the ingredients on the label.
Hence
, they will
also
 discourage making the buying decision. Apart from that, governments can introduce a mechanism or legislation to display the
sugar
 level of each and every product.
This
 will assist people to know the
carbohydrate
content
 of the item prior to their purchasing decision. In conclusion, it can be argued that the reason to have many health issues is the glucose
content
 in consumable
products
 and there are a number of ways where the consumption of
carbohydrate
Fix the agreement mistake
carbohydrates
show examples
 can be discouraged via the involvement of the government.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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