Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. what are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?
It is widely seen nowadays that people can enlighten their
life
with computers and kids Fix the agreement mistake
lives
also
expose
to Wrong verb form
exposed
such
kinds of computer
games
. In this
essay, the problems and the solution will be discussed further
.
First and foremost, there are at least two main negative impacts of playing computer
games
. The first one is related to health issues. This
is mainly because children are exposed to screen
continuously and Fix the agreement mistake
screens
this
can severely their eyesight. Another problem which might appear is associated with anti-sociable. One such
example is the offspring who are glued to their games
could spend most hours there and are reluctant to build any relationship with others.
However
, there are also
some measures that could be taken to overcome the problems. The first viable solution is that parents should keep an eye on their kids and limit their time for playing computer
games
. If the guardians take this
action, more children will not addictive
to Replace the word
be addicted
this
activity. The other related visible way is by limiting the addicted games
by the government. This
is particularly essential because restricting inappropriate games
will lessen the interest of children to play and the stakeholders also
could allow only the educational games
that would benefit their improvement in school.
In conclusion, playing computer
games
can cause some catastrophes including both medical problems because of high exposure to the screens and less sociable issues. Nevertheless
, there are some solutions to reduce the case involving the parent's actions and the limitation of games
by the government.Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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Task Achievement
The essay partially addresses the task, but the response is not fully developed.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has some logical structure, but the introduction and conclusion need improvement. The supporting points are moderately clear.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary, and the use of academic language is inadequate. More diverse and precise vocabulary should be used.
Grammatical Range
There are several grammatical errors throughout the essay. The use of complex sentences and grammatical structures is limited. Improvement is needed in sentence structure and accuracy.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
