The position of women in society has changed markedly in the last twenty years. Many of the problems young people now experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is irrefutable that the designation of a woman in the community has transformed dramatically in the past two decades. Some people argue that
this
change bought many issues for the new generation as nowadays women are
also
bread-earners for their families and so have less to no time to spend with their offspring.
This
essay does not agree with the aforementioned views because I believe that the prominent factors behind teenagers' crime are the
internet
and the government. To commence with the most stupid predominant reason to support my perspective, technological advancement especially the
internet
is the primary culprit behind
this
unexpected change. To explain, due to online education, children become fully dependent on the
internet
for their studies. Even though there are restrictions on the websites a teenager can access, still sometimes kids expose to insecure websites and become the victim of cybercrime.
For example
, a survey conducted by a UK University concluded that more than 57% of online cyber attackers were between the age of 14-23 years old.
Thus
,
this
makes it clear that a mother has no role in these law-breakers.
Furthermore
,
this
essay agrees that to some extent the local government
also
played a crucial role in
this
unforeseen change. To go deeper, due to economical and unemployment pressure, both parents have to work to fulfil the elementary needs of their families.
Consequently
, a mother and a father do not have time to has an eye on their children's activities. So, the government has to take some effective measures to curb inflation, which can give a golden opportunity for parents to have quality time with their offspring and enlighten the right path to them. To illustrate, a survey conducted by Cambridge University concluded that the countries that have control over their expenses have less to no juvenile delinquency. In a nutshell, the
internet
and the local legitimate agencies are the two main reasons behind the young lawbreakers, as parents cannot have a 24/7 watchful eye on their kid's online activities because they have to fulfil their basic needs as well.
Thus
, these factors are sufficient to prove my viewpoint.
Submitted by sdeepkaur9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • evolution
  • domestic roles
  • diverse professional engagements
  • dual-working parents
  • family dynamics
  • juvenile delinquency
  • societal and economic factors
  • dual-income households
  • childcare methods
  • community support systems
  • gender roles
  • family responsibilities
  • professional aspirations
  • development needs
  • correlation
  • simplistic causation
  • workplace policies
  • flexible hours
  • parental leave
  • gender equality
  • role models
  • successful womanhood
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!