The aging population is good for business, the economy and society. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#population #business #economy #society

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Some people believe that aged people are good at

business

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, the

economy

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and

for

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apply

show examples

society

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While

Linking Words

others disagree.

Although

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the

aging

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ageing

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population can't follow modern

trends

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, I believe that their experience, knowledge, and proficiency are keys for

business

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economy

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and

society

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. They are not able to follow present

trends

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quickly. As

Correct article usage

the

show examples

world changes every year with

launching

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the launching

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new

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of new

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technologies, changeable differences in peoples'

pshychology

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psychology

, so it makes

aged

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the aged

show examples

population a little bit confused and they can not get used to

this

Linking Words

quickly.

For instance

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, the leader of

IBM

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the IBM

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company is

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aged man with

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apply

show examples

vast experience, but the holdings of IBM have decreased

due to

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his disability of following new

trends

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. Despite the fact that it is hard to maintain modern

trends

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for them, my perspective is that they are irreplaceable in

business

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economy

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, and

society

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due to

Linking Words

their proficiency. Aged nationality is well-educated and vast-experienced enough to lead

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business

Correct article usage

a business

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or to be sociable.

That is

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because not only universities in the past were much

strongrer

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stronger

than

now

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new

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ones, but

also

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because they have a large

experince

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experience

within

lives

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their lives

show examples

. Take

for example

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Microsofts'

creater

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creator

Bill Gates, who is now almost 70 years old, and his company which is on the top. If we hadn't

such

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experinced

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experienced

and proficient identities on our planet, the development would stop.

Therefore

Linking Words

Change the capitalization

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believe that

this

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group of people is essential for

business

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economy

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the economy

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, and

society

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. In conclusion,

aged

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the aged

show examples

population can't follow modern

trends

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such

Linking Words

cases, I,

however

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, consider that they are parents for

business

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economy

Correct article usage

the economy

show examples

and

society

Use synonyms

Submitted by prostoy.pacan4ek on Thu Jan 26 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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The aging population is good for business, the economy and society. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Is mental strength important for success in sports or is it more important to have strong and fit people in sports? Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The plan below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today

In some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kid of food. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people believe that children of all ages should have extra responsibilities (for example, helping at home or at work). Others believe that, outside of school, children should be free to enjoy their lives. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.