A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust

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this

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period of modernity, many people are judging

according to

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social

staus

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status

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and possession of materials. Honour, kindness and trust no longer seem important. In my opinion, I strongly agree with

this

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notion and my opinion will be discussed in

further

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paragraphs with a suitable conclusion. Supporting my agreement with the given statement, I firmly believe that people nowadays look into social status and material possessions. To cite an example, if you own a Mercedes or BMW over a smaller car, even some police officers would treat you respectfully.

Moreover

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, if you are holding a higher social status, the respect you get is comparatively high.

For instance

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, if you are a bank manager, you would get many opportunities to go front in a queue.

On the other hand

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, if you are a teacher who did a

marvolous

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marvellous

job in educating children will not have the same chance. Current society has practised

Correct article usage

a matirial-oriented

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matirial-oriented

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material-oriented

mindset over humanity. Explaining some of another supporting

point

Fix the agreement mistake

points

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in favour of

this

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statement, it is true that kindness/trust or honour not matters any longer.

As a

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result

Add a comma

,result

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people who had

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apply

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great

reputations

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reputation

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back there are now old, and will not be treated the same as others. As an example, the principal of a school who did major social service to the entire society doesn't get even a seat on the bus. But imagine if a politician got into the same bus, he will get a seat immediately. In conclusion, a

persons'

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person's

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worth is measured

according to

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the status he/she has or the materials that person owns despite the honour, trust or kindness. I believe that the aforementioned points are strongly supporting my viewpoint

Submitted by dmdeemanthakasun on Sun Jan 29 2023

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

278 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Social status
Material possessions
Old-fashioned values
Honour
Kindness
Trust
Judged
Importance
Traditional
Reflection
Achievements
Hard work
Disregarded
Well-balanced
Meaningful
Cultural norms
Societal norms

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