IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Government should focus thier spending in public service rather than on arts such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#government #focus #thier #service #arts #music
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In
this
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 contemporary epoch,it was always
debatable
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a debatable
the debatable
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topic
Correct word choice
whether topic
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of
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apply
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administrative
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administration
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 should
distinct
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distinguish
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 their
expand
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expansion
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 in
benevolences
Fix the agreement mistake
benevolence
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.A majority of society
favour
Correct subject-verb agreement
favours
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 that
government
Use synonyms
 should have to spend on sculpture
such
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 as music and painting.
However
Linking Words
,I
partially
Replace the word
part
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 with
this
Linking Words
mention
Wrong verb form
mentioned
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phenomenan
Correct your spelling
phenomenon
phenomenal
phenomena
 and
i
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I
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 will discuss
with
Correct pronoun usage
it with
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logical
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the logical
a logical
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 conclusion in the upcoming paragraph. There
are
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is
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 adequate evidence of
this
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 view.Which are substantial.The first and foremost one
is occupy
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is occupying
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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money
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 on public facilities gives
individual
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individuals
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 so many benefits like masses experience to live in modern flats,
house
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houses
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 and
apartment
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apartments
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as well as
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its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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also
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provide
Wrong verb form
providing
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 them
modern
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with modern
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 playground parks where pupils can safely play.Adding more to it
squander
Wrong verb form
squandering
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money
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 on public infrastructure it is good for
hospitality
Correct article usage
the hospitality
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sectors
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sector
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.
While
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Use synonyms
development
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the development
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 of hospitals
are
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is
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 very helpful for individuals so,they can take more
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 from hospitals or
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 and
aslo
Correct your spelling
also
 public hospitals provide
a
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an
show examples
 excellent number of treatment
in
Change preposition
for
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 less
money
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 respectively.
consequently
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 with the
development
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 of
Use synonyms
nation
Correct article usage
the nation
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 people
also
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 get
a
Remove the article
apply
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alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
lot
 of new jobs and high paid income. Probing ahead spending
money
Use synonyms
 on arts
such
Linking Words
 as music and painting is
also
Linking Words
good
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a good
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 investment for
Use synonyms
nation
Add an article
the nation
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.
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However
Add a comma
,However
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its
Correct pronoun usage
it
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 attract
the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourist attraction.
Moreover
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for example
Linking Words
 if
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of tourists visit to see the art of the
country
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then
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Use synonyms
government
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the government
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 can earn so much
foreigner
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foreign
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 currency and that
money
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 they can invest in
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development
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the development
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 of the
country
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.
Besides
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 that the
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country
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country's
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 economy is grown up
as well as
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 the GDP of
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nation
Add an article
the nation
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 is
also
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increase
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increasing
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 rapidly.
To conclude
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,
according to
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me
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,me
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 the main
things
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thing
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 is
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development
Add an article
the development
a development
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 of
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nation
Correct article usage
the nation
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 even
government
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 spend on public facilities or even its
spend
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spending
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 on sculptures both
sided
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sides
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nation
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 get the
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 best way to modify the
country
Use synonyms
 is better if they spend on public facilities so it can be faster
development
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by sharma1997.rahulthakur on

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