There is a increased use of technology in the workplace. some people find that is good for young peoples prospect of gaining a job and harder for older people agree audition

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In today's perpetually transforming epoch. Technology has increased the world.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, few individuals find technology is good for the young masses' perspective for getting employment and hard for senior citizens. I fully agree with the above Nation and explained it in forthcoming paragraphs Two commence with the agreement said of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

phenomenon, the first and foremost is lacking knowledge.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the older mass does not have enough knowledge regarding new technology stuff and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they got a job in a particular company in their time when using
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
automation equipment were not too much. So, older individuals are good at pragmatic skills rather than automation skills.
for example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, young men and women can live in the modern world and Dev
no
Add a missing verb
has no

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
everything regarding machinery things.So,
young
Correct article usage
the young

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
population are doing good work without any burden rather than the older ones.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, older
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities

It seems that community may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
have many bodies related problems and have less working ability.
In other words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, nowadays, older individuals have more
in
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
health than in the past they are suffering from many diseases
Correct quantifier usage
apply

It seems that quantifier use may be incorrect here.

show examples
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

. diabetes, high sugar levels and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

asthma and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

many companies prefer to take
that employees
Change the determiner
that employee
those employees

It appears that the singular demonstrative that is modifying the plural noun employees. Consider using a plural demonstrative or a singular noun instead.

show examples
who
has
Change the verb form
have

The singular verb has does not appear to agree with the plural subject that employees. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples
higher chances to trial a long time and
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

low health and illness,health there is no idea of how they live long. So, many Industries prefer to take youngsters.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, young society
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject young society. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

show examples
a Fairless ability and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

good motives for their struggle, they
able
Add a missing verb
are able

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

show examples
to struggle in complex situations and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

have the energy to do effort long-lasting production.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
older
Correct article usage
the older

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
crowd
Fix the agreement mistake
crowds

It seems that crowd may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
do not have energy . So, they cannot able to do work for a long time.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the younger ones good than the older ones. In conclusion, younger human beings are becoming more productive and Fairless the ability for their company. So, youngsters are a good opportunity to Grab jobs rather than older people.
Submitted by vaisuprajapati1997 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: