Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of that all mothers and fathers should be required to take the childcare training courses. Do you agree or disagree?
In recent years, a lot of
parents
have worked for a long time on work and did not have any time to accompany their children. Use synonyms
Consequently
, many younger ones had negative behaviours to have. Linking Words
Therefore
, I strongly believe that parental guidance should Linking Words
need
to run for all Wrong verb form
be given
parents
participating. Use synonyms
This
essay will expound on my views and supply some examples.
To commence, there are two major reasons to evident my point of view. Linking Words
First,
if some educational communities had to provide various parental events or campaigns for Linking Words
adults
to take part in, it would have a good relationship and cooperation with schools and Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
Linking Words
due
to enhance their kids' global development. To illustrate, some social experts said that many nations' educational institutions Change preposition
apply
such
as Linking Words
western
countries, Capitalize word
Western
in
Change preposition
apply
which
had better cooperation with Correct pronoun usage
apply
adults
in order to educate their sons or daughters in the same ways. Use synonyms
As a result
, the role of the school could be easier to catch up with the younger learners' development.
Linking Words
Furthermore
, another reason is to Linking Words
be raising
Wrong verb form
raise
adults
' sense of belonging to their school places. Use synonyms
For instance
, some surveys told us that if Linking Words
adults
took part in various childcare training courses, Use synonyms
it
would have decreased by 30% per year incidents occurring. Correct pronoun usage
the
This
tendency could be an alarm to Linking Words
parents
' mindset owing to preventing accidents. Use synonyms
Hence
, childcare training lessons should Linking Words
need
for every parent to join and study how to look after in the right ways.
In a nutshell, following the statements above, parental guidance or childcare training courses Verb problem
be
also
should Linking Words
need to
run for all Verb problem
be
parents
participating. Use synonyms
However
, if some Linking Words
adults
do not have time to join, I suggest using online platforms Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
of
, as it could be a better future for the child's development.Correct word choice
apply
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task response
Task Response: The essay addresses the topic but lacks depth and development. It is important to provide more detailed arguments and examples to support your position. Additionally, ensure that the central argument is clear and well-supported throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay has a clear structure and uses cohesive devices to connect ideas. However, there are some issues with the logical flow of ideas, and the examples provided could be more relevant and specific. Ensure that each paragraph supports the main argument and that examples are well-integrated into the overall argument.