IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In many countries today, people in cities either live alone or in small family units, rather than in large extended family groups. Is this a positive or negative trend?

#countries #people #cities #live #units #groups #trend
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It is true that nowadays living alone or living
nuclear
Change preposition
in nuclear
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 families
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 been trendy
between
Change preposition
among
show examples
 many
towns
Correct your spelling
townspeople
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people
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
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this
 is
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 trend. There are several reasons why I would argue that living in
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
nuclear
families
Fix the agreement mistake
family
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
trend
Add an article
a trend
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. Living in a nuclear family and growing up alone can have a negative effect on
children
's minds. Because in a nuclear family or
single parent
Add a hyphen
single-parent
show examples
, childcare becomes a stressful part of daily life.
Children
 who grow up with only their parents in a nuclear family without grandparents or aunts and uncles want to be alone after they finish
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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school.
Therefore
,
children
 who grow up in
a nuclear families
Correct the article-noun agreement
a nuclear family
nuclear families
show examples
 become a little more
introvert
Replace the word
introverted
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 than
children
 who grow up in
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
extended
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
.
On the other hand
. Perhaps living alone is become
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
trendy
Replace the word
trend
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 among
people
.
However
 it has
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
big damage to
human's
Change noun form
human
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 health from the mental side
people
 who live alone have no one to talk
,
Change preposition
to, therefore
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therefore
 they cannot share their problems or discuss the events of their daily life. Humans who live alone tend to watch more TV, play video games and chat with friends online
due to
 the lack of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
contact with
people
 in the home. All of these can increase mental illness.
Take
Wrong verb form
Taking
show examples
 everything into
a
Correct article usage
apply
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account I believe that
people
 prefer to live in an extended family and worrying live in a nuclear family.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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