IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The line graph below shows the oil production and consumption in China between 1982 and 2006.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line chart illustrates how much
oil
Use synonyms
 was produced and consumed in China from 1982 to 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that there was an upward trend in both the
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption of
oil
Use synonyms
 during the given
period
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
oil
Use synonyms
 consumption climbed significantly faster compared to its
production
Use synonyms
 over 24 years. At the beginning of the
period
Use synonyms
, the figures for both
oil
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption were nearly equal, at around 2
million
Use synonyms
 barrels per day. After 8 years, the amount of
oil
Use synonyms
 produced rose significantly by 1
million
Use synonyms
 and remained unchanged until 1994. Meanwhile, that of
oil
Use synonyms
 consumed witnessed
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
stability until 1990, after which it climbed remarkably to 3
million
Use synonyms
 in 1994. In the second half of the
period
Use synonyms
, the figure for
oil
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 increased slightly to 3.5
million
Use synonyms
 barrels per day.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the amount of
oil
Use synonyms
 consumed grew steadily by 1
million
Use synonyms
 every 4 years, and
finally
Linking Words
 reached a peak of 6
million
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
 of the
period
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words oil, production, period, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "climbed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: