IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, others think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both ways and give your opinion.

#university #education #job #hand #skills
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With the
decreases
Fix the agreement mistake
decrease
show examples
 in the birth rate, most
people
Use synonyms
 can study at
the
Correct article usage
a
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 university. Some argue that having a high
qualification
Use synonyms
 is advantageous to be hired
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a good
job
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 other say experiences are more important than any
further
Linking Words
 theoretical studies. I believe that
this
Linking Words
 depends on
people
Use synonyms
 and the occupation they choose.    Some high-paying companies use
candidates
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candidates'
candidate's
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profile
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profiles
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 to determine
wether
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 they will
held
Change the verb form
hold
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
job
Use synonyms
 interview with them or not since they usually get
overwhelmed
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overwhelming
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number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
people
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 applying
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. Having
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
qualification
Use synonyms
 definitely helps you to be
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a part of that selected group.
In addition
Linking Words
, some
occupation
Fix the agreement mistake
occupations
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 known as
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
highly paid
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job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
need
Change the verb form
needs
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certification to be,
such
Linking Words
 as
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
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,
lawyer
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lawyers
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, and
doctor
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doctors
show examples
. A certificate is only available to acquire in
Linking Words
further
Add an article
a further
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 education
institution
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institutions
show examples
. Most professional work values
the
Correct article usage
apply
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experience rather than education. One example is
stage
Correct article usage
the stage
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 manager. Many successful stage managers have
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
excellent communication skills and are very organized which
come
Correct subject-verb agreement
comes
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through
Change preposition
from
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 their daily experiences.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 working in
artistic
Add an article
the artistic
an artistic
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 field,
such
Linking Words
 as
director
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directors
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 and painters do their
job
Use synonyms
 using their own artistic views. These are learned through their activities and sometimes come from their outstanding level of perception and talents. In conclusion, I believe that it varies depending on
person
Add an article
the person
a person
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 whether they should have a high
Use synonyms
qualification
Replace the word
quality
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 or not. Some high-paid
Use synonyms
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 need
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
specific
qualification
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 which
only
Add a missing verb
are only
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 available to those who did special
trainings
Change the wording
training
pieces of training
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while
Linking Words
 many professional jobs cherish the experiences that
candidate
Correct article usage
the candidate
show examples
 went through.
Submitted by akiyamam on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • structured and comprehensive understanding
  • specialized skills
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving abilities
  • career advancement
  • networking opportunities
  • internships
  • alumni associations
  • career services
  • practical experience
  • hands-on skills
  • trades, arts, and technology
  • soft skills
  • communication
  • teamwork
  • leadership
  • real-world working environment
  • job performance
  • career growth
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