Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to guarantee a good job. Others believe that it would be better to go straight into work and get experience instead. Discuss both sides and give you opinion.

Today, we have the easiest access to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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education than ever before in history.
Consequently
, many people around the world want to enter a
university
to guarantee themselves a good
job
.
However
, others argue that it would be better not to waste time at
university
and go straight into work to get
experience
. Personally, I think that
universities
give you the best long-time working opportunities.
Firstly
, working
experience
in
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
very crucial. We could recall unemployment statistics where even not all graduates of top
universities
can find a
job
. But what I think is that the best way to approach
is
Correct pronoun usage
this is
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to get internships
while
you are studying.
Universities
give you a wide range of knowledge which can not be substituted with working
experience
,
however
Add the comma(s)
,however
show examples
if you got a diploma and had some internships, you would get the dream
job
.
Secondly
, it is a
wide
Replace the word
widely
show examples
known fact that the best companies would not employ you after your school graduation.
For instance
, consulting firms like McKinsey have very tough entrance conditions like interviews, Maths
exam
Fix the agreement mistake
exams
show examples
and other sorts of tests. And I am sure that people with only secondary education would not be able to pass the tests. So you either have to spend a lot of time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
self-preparation or to get a
job
in a worse company. In conclusion, I consider
that
Correct word choice
apply
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it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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very important to get a
university
degree. Working
experience
is very beneficial when you are trying to get a
job
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
it might be not enough to compete with people who finished
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
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. I maintain that we should do both: study and try to get some working
experience
on internships
while
you
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
are at the
university
.
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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • higher education
  • specialized fields
  • job prospects
  • earning potential
  • formal education
  • networking opportunities
  • career advancement
  • practical skills
  • work environment
  • financial independence
  • high costs
  • skills and experience
  • formal education
  • prioritize
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