The graph shows the percentage of male and female academic staff members across the faculties of a major university in 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#percentage #staff #members #faculties #university #summarise #information #features #comparisons

The bar chart compares the

porprotion

Correct your spelling

proportion

of female and male academic members across faculties in

university

Correct article usage

the university

show examples

and

divided

Add a missing verb

is divided

show examples

into 7 majors: arts, business, education, engineering, law, medicine, and science in 2012.

Overall

, it is clearly observed that

engineeing

Correct your spelling

engineering

accounted for the highest

percentage

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

other subjects on male

member

even though it

preforms

Correct your spelling

performs

show examples

poorly in female.

While

the

eucation

Correct your spelling

education

was the large

retio

Correct your spelling

ratio

retro

for female and was the lowest proportion for male. Starting with the

percentage

female

Add an article

the female

show examples

member

Fix the agreement mistake

members

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

72% accounted for the vast majority in education

major

Fix the agreement mistake

majors

show examples

and followed by arts and medicine which was 58% and 50%, respectively.

On the other hand

, the lowest

percentage

of female

member

Fix the agreement mistake

members

show examples

engineering

Change preposition

in engineering

show examples

at solely 18%. With regard to,

male

Add an article

a male

the male

show examples

member

Fix the agreement mistake

members

show examples

in various majors,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

85% was the largest

percentage

which was in engineering,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

followed by business and science at 62%, revealing

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the same performance.

However

, the education major occupied

Change preposition

apply

show examples

25%

for

Change preposition

show examples

male

member

Fix the agreement mistake

members

show examples

which was the less majority

amoung

Correct your spelling

among

other sectors.

Submitted by nuchnapa.anna on Wed Feb 22 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, member with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

165 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The graph shows the percentage of male and female academic staff members across the faculties of a major university in 2012 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

living in a country where you have to speak a foreigen language can cause seriouse social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays many jobs are more stressful and the working day is longer. What are the reasons for this? What can employers do to help employees?

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

Some people feel that the government should regulate the level of violence in films on television and at the cinema. Others feel that violent films should not be regulated. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.