IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

Fossil fuels are the main source of energy around the world. However, people are being encouraged to use alternative energy sources such as wind energy, solar energy and so on. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Why?

#fuels #source #energy #world #people #alternative #sources #wind #development
On the other hand
, as educators easily access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an enormous amount of information on the internet, using technology development is beneficial to teach a wider range of subjects in schools. As long as tutors or pupils have mobile devices
such
 as
laptop
Fix the agreement mistake
laptops
show examples
, they can approach to obtain intellectual knowledge wherever.
For example
, most schools are now adopting computer-based teaching programs to beyond the intellectual limitation of paper books.
Therefore
, it is essential to use the internet to offer infinite intelligence
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 students. In conclusion, paper books and the internet have to exist together because each one has its own benefits to deliver knowledge to students.
Consequently
, educational departments around the world should find
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ways to utilise both of them in school
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
 properly.
Submitted by mix5777 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fossil fuels
  • alternative energy sources
  • wind energy
  • solar energy
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • environmental benefits
  • reduction of greenhouse gas emissions
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable energy
  • energy independence
  • energy security
  • cost challenges
  • infrastructure challenges
  • reliability issues
  • intermittency issues
What to do next:
Look at other essays: