Human activity has had a negative impact on planet and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both the views and give your opinion

#activity #impact #planet #animals #world #people #actions #change

Humans are

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

greedy creatures. they destroy a lot of natural environments just to fulfil what they need and it brings negative impacts on the planet.

this

issue will be discussed in the following paragraph. what many people have done to earth

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

brought a terrifying result for the environment. a lot of forests have been destroyed, ocean and air are polluted. various animals are now endangered because of humans. many parties urge for a change. Even though it takes a long time to restore the planet, it needs to be done as soon as possible. activists say that government should take charge to rebuild animals' habitats,

restore

Wrong verb form

restoring

show examples

the forest or even

reduce

Wrong verb form

reducing

show examples

air pollution to save the planet.

on the other hand

, a bunch of

businessman

Change to a plural noun

businessmen

show examples

or even government say that they need to do

this

for economical reasons. they still need a ton of natural resources for human life. the other consider destroying forests to expand housing areas or even building a new factory.

for example

, Indonesia is moving its capital city to Kalimantan. on the one ,hand it's good for democracy, on the other ,hand it cost a large area of forest to build the new capital in conclusion,

this

activity has

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

various results for humans. it has a negative impact

for

Change preposition

show examples

the earth

however

it gives benefits to some parties. in my ,opinion

this

issue needs to be solved

although

it only gives small benefits because if

this

thing keeps happening, later

Add the comma(s)

,on

show examples

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

will become the next target of

this

problem.

Submitted by fmosespraban on Wed Mar 01 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

257 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Nowadays the way many people interact why each other has changed because of technology In what ways has technology affected the types of relation ship people make Has this become a positive or negative development?
In recent years , the advancement that had happened in technology affect a lot on the communication among people and change the way they used to interact with each other , which make people have online friend way more than actual friend . I believe this advancement has both pros and cones that I will discussed .
4.5
band
It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?
Nowadays there is more choice for the consumers then ever in the past. Most small towns have a large supermarket and you can buy any product on the internet with just the click. This might be good for consumners but small local shops are competition and they have to close, in my opinion we need to protect small shops by closing.
6.5
band
An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?
Many service-oriented professionals from underdeveloped or developing countries migrate to developed ones for employment. Indeed these situations cause a brain-drain in their home country. These problems can be solved by the government by recognizing their valuable work and providing them with good pay.
6
band
Some people believe that allowing childern to make their own choices on everyday matters (Such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuls who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for childern to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is thought by a selection of individuals that letting the younger generation decides what they want on everyday matters leading to allowing them to think about themselves, resulting in an isolated society. However, others believe that we should just let them make decisions that are critical for their lives only. In this essay, both viewpoints will be outlined in the following paragraphs before reaching my conclusion which is I agree with the latter notion.
5
band
'We should introduce laws to make businesses and state services employ equal numbers of male and female workers in every department or area of the company.' How far do you support this idea? Give reasons for your answer, and support your essay with ideas and examples from your own experience. You should write at least 250 words.
Their is no doubt, that laws should protect basic human values and stimulate development of society. However, i do not agree with the idea to make businesses and state services employ equal numbers of male and female workers in every department or area of the company. The initiative has many drawbacks, which I will be described in the essay.

Human activity has had a negative impact on planet and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both the views and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays the way many people interact why each other has changed because of technology In what ways has technology affected the types of relation ship people make Has this become a positive or negative development?

It can be difficult for small local shops to compete with large supermarkets and with on-line shops. How does this affect local communities? What could be done to improve this situation?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?