The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in over-weight people in the society? How can this problem be solved?

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many people

nawadys

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nowadays

prefer to use

fast

Add an article

the fast

show examples

train

Fix the agreement mistake

trains

show examples

and they

ecourage

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encourage

the government to build new railways ,

whereas

Linking Words

other

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others

show examples

say that

polotics

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politics

should concentrate more on improving the existing public transport. in my opinion, developing a new railway would be better than improving

old

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the old

show examples

road

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roads

show examples

since

trains

Use synonyms

are faster and safer than cars or other

transportations

Change the noun form

transportation

show examples

vehicles.In

this

Linking Words

essay

Add a comma

,essay

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I will

further

Linking Words

explain both views and give relevant examples.

To Begin

Linking Words

, in the matter of construction

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

new

rail ways

Correct your spelling

railways

show examples

for fast

trains

Use synonyms

especially if they are electrical ones ,will be the best thing to

inhance

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enhance

movement between cities for several reasons.

Firstly

Linking Words

trains

Use synonyms

are faster than cars since they have a

biger

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bigger

show examples

engain

Correct your spelling

again

,and

this

Linking Words

will be more practical.

Secondly

Linking Words

trains

Use synonyms

are

also

Linking Words

safeter

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safer

safety

than cars because they move on a

rail way

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railway

show examples

acceedents

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accidents

are less to happen ,so

this

Linking Words

will safe many

people

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people's

show examples

lives.

Finally

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will reduce traffic

congustion

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congestion

on the main roads.

However

Linking Words

, there are other individuals who prefer to

spent

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spend

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the money in

develop

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developing

show examples

the existing

high ways

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highways

show examples

or public transporters or any other facilities ,which are related to them.

moreover

Linking Words

, they may believe so as they like to use the bus ,which is cheaper in most cases than

trains

Use synonyms

Additionally

Linking Words

,because some existing

trains

Use synonyms

are fine , they do not

requir

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require

a new one ,

whereas

Linking Words

most of them need some maintenance only ,and

this

Linking Words

will be cheaper than building a new one.

To conclude

Linking Words

, money has different uses to develop

transportations

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transportation

show examples

between cities ,but some have argued

Change preposition

about

show examples

the way of

useing

Correct your spelling

using

it . on one hand, some of them say that it should be used to update the old public

transpotations

Correct your spelling

transportation

transportations

on the other hand

Linking Words

, other say that building a new railway has more advantages ,and the money should be used in

this

Linking Words

way as the new

trains

Use synonyms

are

fastest

Correct article usage

the fastest

show examples

and safest.

mohmmadloaa95Sun Mar 05 2023

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in over-weight people in the society? How can this problem be solved?

Your opinion

Social media is popular and used by many people. However, some people think that social media can be bad for mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Large businesses have big budgets for marketing and promotion and as a result, people gravitate towards buying their products. What problem does this cause? What could be done to encourage people to buy local product?

The advantages brought by the spread of English as a global language will outweigh the disdavantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the view

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of the museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that it is better to work for a large company than a small one. Do you agree or disagree?