IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

The beat way to understand other cultures is to work for a multinational organization. To what extent to you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any examples.

#beat #cultures #work #organization
It is commonly believed by many that in order to identify different
cultures
, ones should be employed in certain international institutes or companies. To be honest, I am of opinion that
this
 is not true as we can get to know about foreign
cultures
 in various ways, and I am going to exemplify it in the following paragraphs. First and foremost, Individuals are capable of gaining a better understanding of distinct authentic
cultures
 by studying
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
books or travelling. To put it simply, the more we make a journey to other societies, the more we could simply learn some aspects from them.
This
 valuable experience would allow us to be more optimistic and flexible because we can identify the differences between
cultures
 and customs.
Furthermore
, the internet has played a crucial role in educating its users to learn more about
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
cultural diversity in recent decades. In
this
 way, social media platforms can
also
 widen their horizons
connecting
Change preposition
by connecting
show examples
 to other communities around the globe, resulting in a relationship among people. When it comes to making a new friend overseas, many find it effortless and convenient in
comparision
Correct your spelling
comparison
 to other means of learning about
cultures
.
To conclude
, there has been an argument
whether
Change preposition
about whether
show examples
 ones should be hired to work in multicultural organisations or not. In my view, I do not agree with
this
 notion since we have a myriad of
altertive
Correct your spelling
alternative
alternatives
 to
understand
Wrong verb form
understanding
show examples
 overseas
cultures
 and traditions.
For example
, I had an opportunity to
learned
Change the form of the verb
learn
show examples
 a lot about Laos festivals and traditional food when I made a visit many years ago, which exposed me to surprising and memorable moments there.
Submitted by keakyenge on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: