IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

People doing dangerous sporting activities like scuba-diving and bungee-jumping should be responsible for their own safety. Rescue workers should not risk their lives to save people doing those sports. Do you agree or disagree?

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In
this
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 contemporary world, it is undoubtedly true that risky sports are getting more popular. One school of thought opines that
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
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 doing risky sports like
bungee-jumping
Correct your spelling
bungee jumping
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 and
scuba-diving
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scuba diving
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 should be done at their own
risks
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risk
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.
People
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 working as rescuers can not
risk
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 their
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life
Replace the word
lives
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 for other
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people
Change noun form
people's
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 enjoyment. I firmly agree with the laid statement and
Correct article usage
the resons
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resons
Correct your spelling
reasons
 for inclination are articulated in
further
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 paragraphs. To embark with, there
are
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is
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number
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a number
the number
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 of reasons, supporting my ideology out of
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
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the strongest one is that
people
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 should
risk
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 and have safety their own
life
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 by not depending on others like rescuers to help or save them by doing
such
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 dangerous activities.
Rescue
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people
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 have their own
life
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 and they
risk
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 it for other
people
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 just for some sum of money.
For instance
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, if something goes wrong
by
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with
show examples
Use synonyms
rescue
Correct article usage
a rescue
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 person everybody is going to blame him for their mistake. On the
flipside
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flip side
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, there are
less
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fewer
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people
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 advocating the opposite
view-point
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viewpoint
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. The first and foremost reason is that
rescue
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people
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shoulb
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should
 be
their
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there
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 because if a person is doing it
first
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the first
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 time they can help them with it and
people
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 will get confidence
for
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in
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 performing
such
Linking Words
 sporting activities
by
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in
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 the presence of
rescue
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 workers.
Rescue
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people
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 can
risk
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 their
life
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 for sake of the
people
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 and their
family
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families
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 too. Agglomerating all the points, I hereby again favour my perception that
people
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 should
risk
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 their
life
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by
Change preposition
at
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 their own
risk
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 and not
depending
Wrong verb form
depend
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 on
rescue
Use synonyms
 persons.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • intrinsic risks
  • rigorous training
  • ethical duty
  • thrill-seeking behaviors
  • high-risk activities
  • rescue operations
  • emotional toll
  • financial burden
  • safety standards
  • regulations
  • innovation
  • technology-enhanced safety
  • personal responsibility
  • adventure sports
  • extreme sports
What to do next:
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