The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The bar chart shows some changes in the percentage of people who were born in

Australia

Use synonyms

and who were born outside

Australia

Use synonyms

in cities, rural and towns from 1995 to 2010.

Overall

Linking Words

, living cities had got the highest level of percentages of all, which is over 50% in any countries.

In addition

Linking Words

, the number probability had gone up in 2010.

Although

Linking Words

when it comes to people who reside in rural areas, there is a significant difference between 1995 and 2010. Let's dive into it. In 1995, in

Australia

Use synonyms

, there are about 30 % of residents stayed in , and even ,more

Change preposition

than 40

show examples

% of citizens who were born outside of

Australia

Use synonyms

lived in

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

Whereas

Linking Words

in 2010, it declined to 17% who live in the outskirts, especially outside of

Australia

Use synonyms

only 5%. At

last

Linking Words

, the percentage of people living in towns is gradually decreasing in either of the years.

To sum up

Linking Words

, ethnic groups tend to like living in cities rather than villages or rural communities.

Submitted by mof.v914 on Wed Mar 08 2023

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words australia with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

165 words

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The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Many people say that we have developed into a “throw-away” culture, because we are filling up our environment with so many plastic bags and rubbish that we cannot fully dispose of. To what extent do you agree with this opinion and what measures can you recommend reducing this problem ?

You have lost an item of value on a train. Write a letter to the railway company. In your letter: describe the item explain where and when you left it say what action you would like the company to take

In many countries schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solution can you suggest?

In many countries people have to pay for medical care, but some think that it should be a free service provided by the government. To what extent do you agree or disagree?