People are becoming famous with the help of TV programme and the internet.  Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

The phenomenon of
people
using new technologies
such
as TV and
society
Replace the word
social
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media to get famous has aroused wide concern among various circles.
While
it is clear that
the technological product brings obvious benefits to the
people
who want to spread his name to the world, it is
also
true to say it may bring disadvantages as well. Regarding the benefits, probably the most significant one is that
people
get more opportunities to appear themself. To illustrate, television, computer and mobile phone becomes a part of
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
life
Replace the word
living
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in these days.
Therefore
, they are commonly used as
advertising
Add an article
an advertising
show examples
tool
Fix the agreement mistake
tools
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.
People
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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get famous easier than before if they have talent in some ways and use those tools properly. Youtuber is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
concrete evidence of proofing how easy for
people
to get famous. Despite the aforementioned benefit, those technologies
also
have some drawbacks for those
people
. Of all the disadvantages, probably the first pop-up in my mind is that the bad news spread quickly.
For instance
, as an idol in a world that
full
Add a missing verb
is full
show examples
of mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
. Your movements are being
watch
Change the form of the verb
watched
show examples
by the public. Most of your life will be uploaded to the internet by others.
Hence
, if your personal behaviours are not good enough for everyone
such
as smoking, you can
assumes
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assume
show examples
that everyone would know that within a day, even
it
Correct word choice
if it
show examples
is just a
rumor
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rumour
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.
Although
you may think that you can claim that it is fake news through the
society
Replace the word
social
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media, the damagers
already done
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did
are already done
have already done
were already done
show examples
meight
Correct your spelling
might
not able to remove
completely
Correct pronoun usage
it completely
show examples
. Under
this
line of thinking, using
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new technologies to get more popular
have
Change the verb form
has
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both its advantages and disadvantages.
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    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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